A friend of mine speculates that everyone has some version of Crazy, and it’s not necessarily a bad thing. Crazy is those idiosyncrasies that make us special. She does say that not everyone’s Crazy will mesh well with other versions. No one is “wrong”, per se, in those situations, the Crazy just doesn’t match up. I like this way of viewing Crazy, it’s non-pejorative and it embraces the quirks we all have. I’m always leery of folks who say they’re not crazy, even normalcy can be off kilter, depending on the situation and environment.
There are different versions of Crazy but there’s also a state where one can go beyond the standard base Crazy and go straight to Crazy Town. I’m talking about putting on your crazy pants. (The opposite, perhaps, of putting on your Big Person Underpants). When you are hurt or in pain, the crazy pants come out. You might fantasize about doing something destructive or out of character, in an attempt to mitigate the pain. People often find their crazy pants after a bad breakup, when all sorts of unhealthy behavior seems like an excellent idea.
I believe that Crazy is state of consciousness, a baseline of the weird and often wonderful that we all have. However, our emotions, though powerful, do not control us or our behaviors. One could look at crazy pants as the id, that primal beast that wants to react from a purely emotional space. However, as we go through life, we learn (hopefully) coping mechanisms for dealing with those moments when we find and put on our crazy pants. Our ego regulates those unhealthy impulses. Most people I’ve met have, at least once, put on their crazy pants and went out for a night on the town. Leaving the house wearing your crazy pants rarely ends well.
Because we all have a version of Crazy, most folks also have their crazy pants and can empathize when someone they care about puts them on. This is one healthy way of dealing with donning the crazy pants: talk to someone you trust about those unhealthy impulses. Many people can relate, they’ve been there. What is harder to relate to is wearing your crazy pants and going to Crazy Town. Acting on those impulses is a behavior and we are accountable for our behaviors, especially if they hurt other people. Realizing that emotions exist and are valid is essential to accepting our personal humanity, acknowledging that our emotions don’t control our behavior is essential for accepting each other.
Crazy pants happen. We have irrational, intense emotional reactions to situations. How we handle our crazy pants is a measure of our character. Do we own our crazy pants and seek help from people who are not wearing theirs or do we go to Crazy Town? Each situation is different and sometimes the best thing to do is own that you wore your crazy pants when you did something and apologize.